word for the day: judgmental

Ok kids, today's word is judgmental. The dictionary tell us this is an adjective that means 1. of or concerning the use of judgment OR 2. having or displaying an excessively critical point of view. Today seems to have been the day for this not so charming character trait to come to the surface in many people. It started with a person who informed me that people with tattoos are immoral and lacking self esteem. Those of you that know me well are already picturing in your heads the outcome of this conversation. I was, sorry to disappoint, relatively calm in my response. (Maybe the positive thinking stuff is rubbing off) The crazy thing is, that is twice this week that that very same opinion has been voiced by different people. I calmly replied that morality is subjective and my self esteem is perfectly fine. What baffles me is that she firmly believed she could make an accurate judgment of me based on her OPINION of tattoos. Where would these ideas come from? She has her ears pierced. Did she feel the need to adorn her ears with jewels because her self esteem was low? Why does what another person chooses to do with their own bodies bother someone else? This was followed by a story being told to me by a friend who has a child of another nationality. He told me his wife had been asked why she had to fix the little girls hair like a black person. Well for one, the child is indeed, black. She is a beautiful Ethiopian girl. The fact that her parents are white does not matter to her or to them. They are a family. They love each other. Who cares if one of them is purple with pink dots and how does it possibly make a difference to anyone else's existence? So I come home bewildered as to why so many people exhaust themselves worrying about other people's choices and am going to relax and peruse Facebook. Here I come across a person's status about people with nose rings. In all fairness to this person I will say that his status was not in itself judgmental. He was inquiring as to why someone would want something you could hang your keys on dangling from their nose. A fair question which can really only be accurately answered by someone with said ring. Even that person's answer however would only apply to their own personal reasons so maybe a poll of some sort would be better. The judgmental part came from a comment to this particular post. A person stated that someone having a nose ring such as that has no self respect or respect for others. How in the hell is a nose ring disrepectful to someone else? As for their self respect, that goes up there with a person's self esteem being questioned because of some ink. Why do these things bother people? If you want to cover yourself from head to toe with ink, knock yourself out. Pierce your nose, eyebrow, lip, cheek. Shave your head or color your hair pink. Do whatever you want to express yourself and be happy. This does not matter to me because they are YOUR choices. Those outward expressions do nothing to change who you are on the inside. There are many, many seemingly upstanding citizens who are sans body art, piercings or any other signs of "immorality" who are indeed so lacking in morals and character that I would not want them anywhere near me. The same can probably be said of many people who HAVE acquired those things but it is not the choice of a tattoo that made them immoral. I have tried never to judge a book by its cover and have raised my children to be the same. They have friends of many sizes, shapes and colors. Religious choice or lack thereof does not shade their choice in friends either. We have a few homosexual friends and even some rednecks. I have always asked them to base their choices on things that really matter and they have done that. I find it amusing that the people who tend to be the most judgmental of the lot are the conservative religious sort. (again, not all of the people in that category are in fact judgmental and I would not rule a person out as a possible friend based on that criteria alone) These are the same people who drag their little white children to Sunday School and have them memorize Jesus Loves the Little Children. You know the song. Jesus loves the little children. All the children of the world. Red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in his sight, Jesus loves the little children of the world. Does that sentiment only apply until they reach a certain age, remain tattooless, and don't fix their hair in a "black" way? Just curious. Maybe some of these people should really read their good book that they like to misquote. I am pretty sure that the man they are so fond of praying in the name of seemed to be a rather forgiving and embracing kind of person. But then again, what do I know? I am immoral and have no self esteem..........

Until next time,

R.

Update on the Karma to-do list

I thought I would update you on my Karma to-do list. (Assuming any of you care.) I would like to tell you that I have been wildly successful at following my list and that it has resulted in a sudden turn of the course of my life and brought me great wealth and happiness. I really would like to tell you that but I can't. I CAN tell you that I am working on that list daily. Somedays I do well and somedays don't go so great. I have been kind to several people who did not deserve it and it, sadly, did not make me feel any better. My hope on that one is that I am collecting cosmic points that will build up and bring me some reward of good luck in the future. I have seriously decreased the number of times that I use the F bomb in any given day. Not eliminated but decreased. That is progress, right? I have been pretty successful and loving what I have and not getting "things" for the sake of getting them. Before you pat me on the back for that one you should probably know that while I really am trying to love the things I have without wanting more my lack of obtaining "things" from my wish list has more to do with my financial situation than it does my actual willpower but that should count in the grand scheme of things. I don't know that I have had a positive thought for every negative one but I have been working on that too. As for the lifestyle changes, those too are a work in progress. Going back to school has led me to get a little more sleep than I was getting. I have cut way down on diet coke consumption and have been eating better. However, I have noticed that the less diet coke I drink the more prone I am to saying the "f" word and not really worrying about being unkind to the hateful people when I come in contact with them. Maybe life is a great balancing act after all. :)

Until next time............